Book Club Etiquette

If you are considering joining the book club but it’s all new and you want to know a little bit more about how things work, we have created a short list of ‘book club etiquette’ so to speak to help you on your way.

Of course, lists like these are by no means exhaustive, or prescriptive, or even a hard set of rules. But they are useful for setting the tone and the vibe of what the book club is all about.

We have been receiving DMs on our social media asking some questions which we cover below. So this list of book club etiquette is hopefully a useful way of allaying any potential anxieties or concerns before you join the book club.

The art of listening

Have you seen that TikTok meme ‘we listen and we don’t judge’? Yeah, think of that. We are all here to share our thoughts but also respectfully listen. And honestly, it is so worth it, there are some excellent opinions to be heard in our groups.

We encourage our members to take the time to listen and ask each other questions. It makes for great connection, and helps the quieter members of the group to feel included.

Different opinions 

We actively encourage different opinions. We listen and ask questions with curiosity. And the result, we have found, is that you really do get the privilege of connecting with people that way. It is okay if you hated the book, as much as it is okay if you loved the book and no one else did. That is the joy of reading - it means so many different things to different people.

All we ask is that we are mindful and respectful of the range of opinions we might have in the group.

It’s ok to be quiet

If you are shy or introverted, you are still most welcome. And sometimes if life is life-ing and you just want to be quiet, that’s ok too. You are more than welcome to simply listen to the group if you prefer. There is value in being present if that is your preference. We want you to make the Nookery Book Club experience to be what works best for you. 

Reading the book

It’s actually totally ok if you have not finished the book. As long as you’re ok with spoilers do still come along to the book club. There is still so much value in being present and connecting with the other members. We have all been there where life stuff gets in the way for whatever reason, and at almost every club we’ve hosted so far, there is at least one or two members that have yet to finish the book. 

Having a bit of wander 

Some of our members are neurodiverse and need to get a wiggle on every now and then. We are welcoming and inclusive and relaxed at the Nookery Book Club. If you need to stand up, go for a wander, head to the bar, or even take a breather outside, there is absolutely no judgement here. This book club is for you to create a social experience that works best for you. And we actively encourage all our members to be mindful and open-minded. 

Solo adventures

The majority of our members come solo to the book club. You are definitely not alone if you come on your own. If anything, having the book to chat about along with the conversation starters and questions really does help with creating space to chat to new people. 

We find it is less about being confident and more about being curious. 

Give it a little time

For the most part this is why we encourage joining the book club for at least three months to gauge whether it is the right vibe for you. This gives you enough time to settle in, get past those first meetup nerves, start recognising and connecting with people, and read across three different genres of books to see how the conversations flow.

Ultimately, give the club, yourself, and the membership a chance to see how that fits for you. If not, it is totally ok to find something different. There are lots of book clubs out there and we are not precious about it. We want everybody to enjoy stories, and find the right space for them to share their ideas and opinions. 

If any of this sounds like you, we would love to welcome you at The Nookery Book Club. Otherwise, we do hope this helps inspire you to either join a book club or some kind of community meetup where you get to connect and make new friends.